Mail order brides

11. 6. 2017

Ever since the days of Adam and Eve, people all over the world have been searching for love: men looking for women, women looking for men, men looking for men, and women looking for women. Yep, the planet is a mixed-up ball of confusion. But, there is good news. With the advent of the Internet, the search for love has never been easier.

Beginnings:

The term ‘Mail Order Bride’ actually dates back to 19th century America, when women from the better developed areas of the country advertised themselves as available for marriage to the pioneers on the Western frontiers. Of course in those far off days, and even throughout most of the 20th century, all communication was done strictly through the writing of letters and the sending of photographs. Naturally, the better the letter and the more striking the photo, the greater the chance of success. The deeper into the heart of the country and the further West the intrepid explorers went, the more difficult it became for them to settle down. Very few women lived in these uncharted territories, so the pioneers came up with the idea of writing to periodicals and advertising themselves in the columns that became known as ‘Personals.’ If one of these adverts succeeding in alluring a woman, she could answer by writing to the lucky gentleman and maybe enclosing a photograph of herself. Then began the process of exchanging letters until, finally, the lady would travel across country to begin a life with a person she’d never actually met.

As time passed by, the developing frontiers opened up the country, the status quo between states became balanced, and the system of ordering a bride via the mail spread to other nations. Through the course of the 20th century, and indeed into the present time, women from third-world and under-developed countries sought marriage with men from countries that were better off.

Over the past few years, the process of searching for a bride or a husband has transferred itself to the Internet, to such an extent that letter-writing has diminished to the point of non-existence. Modern technology has greatly simplified the matter, and the old-fashioned term ‘Mail Order Bride’ has morphed into another dimension – International Marriage – whereby men and women can contact one another through Internet based dating agencies.

Where do ‘Mail Order Brides’ come from?

With the spectacular collapse of communism, many women from the former Soviet Union and the so-called ‘Eastern bloc’, eager to escape their failed countries and move abroad, are using the many various international dating sites to seek a better way-of-life. Marriage, a firm part of Russian culture, is important, as is the desire to start a family, but the women from Eastern and Central Europe would much rather settle for a future in a foreign country, somewhere that might offer better opportunities – economic, social and quality of life. This is also true of developing countries, such as Thailand, Vietnam and Cambodia, and of countries such as Turkey, Syria, Iran, North Korea and China, where the citizens live under the rules of a harsh regime. By and large, Mail Order Brides are seeking a better livelihood, a husband who will help her with the household chores instead of a man who beats and abuses her, and treats her as a slave.

How do ‘Mail Order Brides’ advertise themselves?

First of all, let’s try to distance ourselves from the term ‘Mail Order Bride,’ it’s an old-fashioned phrase that relates women to chattels and smacks of misogyny and human-trafficking. Nowadays, women and girls who would like to find a husband from a more prosperous country use the services of an international marriage agency, or international dating agency, such as Love International, AnastasiaDate, eHarmony, etc., to post their details on websites which can be accessed worldwide. Through these agencies it’s possible to introduce oneself, via email, instant messaging, and other forms of computer-driven technology, to like-minded people in nations far and wide. Most agencies will offer translation where necessary and trips to countries in the more developed regions of the world, excursions that are normally paid for by the prospective husband. They will also give advice on how best to use the services provided.

Obviously, communication via the Internet has made inroads to all parts of the globe, and every year thousands of women and girls are leaving their native lands to marry men in other countries. While international marriage agencies are legal virtually everywhere, several countries have strict regulations regarding immigration and it is therefore important to check these things out before bringing your beautiful wife back to your home. For example, South Korea, where men seem to have great passion for ladies from the Philippines, Vietnam, Cambodia and Nepal, has seen huge migrations of women from these countries. However, the Cambodian government has recently made it illegal for the country’s women to marry South Koreans.

What are the reasons for seeking ‘Mail Order Brides?’

Good question. The reasons are many and various. More often than not, it’s the simple allure of ‘foreignness,’ the attraction of something different or out of the ordinary. The typical male, working 9 to 5 in his office, surrounded day-in day-out by the same people, eating the same junky fast-food meals and watching the same rubbish churned out every evening by the television companies, is likely to get bored with the repetition of the daily grind. One day, deciding to become pro-active, he’ll tap away on his keyboard in order to find an International Dating Agency. Seeing an array of gorgeous women – blondes, brunettes, tall, short, slim, sleek and sun-tanned – from countries he’s probably never heard of, he’ll rapidly summon up the courage to register with the company. And bingo! He’ll soon be in contact with females from Russia and the Ukraine, Poland and the Philippines, South America, North America, Europe and Asia.

You said there are many reasons!

There are! There are! The above is just one of a huge variety of reasons, which may include divorce, and the need to step outside the envelope; stress of work and the inability to meet single people; illness or handicap; nervousness and shyness about social contact; living in a remote location; the ‘nobody understands me’ syndrome; inquisitiveness; the attraction of different cultures and different beliefs; the allure of a younger woman; and today’s Smart-phone attitude of ‘let’s just have a look to see what’s around.’

How do I find a ‘Mail Order Bride?’

The best way to go about doing this is to join an international or interracial dating service, such as International Love, eHarmony, Meet Asian Singles, or the well-known AsianDating, where you can meet single people from all over the world. Having chosen your service, you should sign in and accept the Privacy Policy. You will then have to create a dating profile, which should include information about yourself and also give some idea of the sort of person you are looking for. At any given moment there are thousands of people searching through profiles, and it’s therefore very important for your profile to be created in such a way as to stand out from the rest and attract the attention of others. However, don’t write too much – no one wants to read an essay. A few lines should be enough, but make sure they are short and catchy, enough to tell the world who you are and what you want. You can also add a photo, or two. Again, they should be the genuine article, not a photo-shopped version of a super hero. Remember, on the day of the BIG MEET your prospective partner will expect to see the same person she fell in love with when she read your dating site profile.

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