Dating outside your comfort zone
27. 5. 2016
Are you looking for a partner or someone to spend your life with? And, having explored all the usual avenues, have you still been unable to find that special person? Maybe now it’s time to leave your comfort zone and try something new!
Have you ever thought about this possibility? Most of us live our lives within the “box”, but all boxes are finite enclosures, and when exhausted and fully explored it could be that you need to open your box and look for something new. To some this might sound strange, but in real life we occasionally have to try something new in order to secure further contacts.
When we reach a dead end, we come up against a brick wall. It’s the same sort of thing as driving along a one-way street – how you can find your ideal partner if you’re always stuck in the same situation? This is about you, so don’t forget that what you receive depends upon what you send out. What you give is what you get (WYGIWYG). This is karma! Sometimes it works slowly, but it always works. If you don’t open your eyes and look around, you’ll never discover your perfect partner even when he or she is standing right there beside you.
Here we suggest a few tips that you could try to work on
- Remove fear and worry from online dating! – If you’re nervous, you’ll be sending negative or “frightened” emotions into the field you’ve constructed around you, emotions that will be picked up by the people with whom you come into contact. When starting a new venture, you need to believe again and open your heart. When attempting the next step, you need to complete the previous one before you can go ahead. Abandon your fear, leave your comfort zone, and start living life to the full!
- Be sure about yourself! – Before you start dating, you should know who you are and what you’re looking for. It’s a simple rule and it works. Think about this! When you know who you are and how to live with yourself, you’ll probably also know exactly what you want and what you need. Understanding this will make it much easier for you to begin the search for your international love. However, don’t change your mind every 5 minutes. Leave your comfort zone, open your eyes, and know who you are and what you want!
- Don’t live with self-pity! – If you wallow in self-pity, you’ll lose your energy and soon end up tired of life. Look into the mirror and ask yourself: “How long do I need to excuse myself through fear and anxiety?” It’s up to you how long you remain single, and until you step away from feeling sorry for yourself you won’t meet that special someone with whom to share your dreams. You will only go round in circles meeting other people like you. So, make the decision: stop living in the “self-pity trap” and greet the new day. Carpe diem. Now’s the time to trash the comfort zone that you created out of self-pity!
- Step out of your fantasy world! – Did you create an amazing dream world around your imagined perfect match? Be cautious of your dream – every coin has two sides. While one side of your dream could lead you in the right direction and maybe help you find someone like yourself, the other side could take you far away from where you want to be. If your demand is too high, it can be very difficult to find your perfect match. There are not many shining knights on white horses, and there are even fewer super models and, anyway, you should realise that while money or an amazingly beautiful partner might bring comfort into your live, they won’t necessarily pour happiness into your heart. Remember, the most important things in life are not always visible. When you leave your comfort zone, step away also from that most beautiful of dreams. Your dreams don’t need you, it’s your mind that needs them. When you are serious about meeting someone, leave your fantasies behind.
- Don’t criticise others! – Have you ever wondered why sometimes you do this? We are all different and each of us is unique. It’s difficult and probably foolish to compare and criticise two absolutely different people. We all have different social and economic backgrounds, so what’s the point of making any comparison? Living with others speaks about tolerance, so how much are you willing to give?
We hope this article helps you to make some new “smallsteps” towards the next chapter in your life.